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Rudy Kelly is a not very good writer from Long Beach, CA. He started playing hockey at the age of 7 after he saw Marty McSorley beat up a guy. His passions in life are hockey, dogs, and occasionally hockey playing dogs. He has been described as "surprisingly zesty." He has been pepper sprayed. He has a restraining order against him, filed by Kelly Hrudey. The last thing happened shortly after the second-to-last thing but before the third to last thing. "See what I said about him not being a very good writer? That was incredibly confusing for the reader. Really, no craftsmanship at all.

NHL Southern California Power Rankings: Week 1

Can you do power rankings with just two teams? Not really but we do it anyway, with a look back at the opening week for the Kings and Ducks!

One More Thing Before the Kings Start Tonight

Here are a few things to watch for in tonight's game against the Canucks.

Two Opening Night Lineups As The NHL Season Begins

2 projections of opening lines for the Ducks and Kings as the NHL season begins.

Three Things To Know When Attending a Hockey Game In Southern California

Where to park, who to avoid (answer: everyone), what to watch for and where to get a drink: everything you need to know to attend a hockey game in Southern California.

The Four Los Angeles Kings To Watch This Season

Want to be cool? Watch the Kings! Here are 4 people to know if you want to be awesome and a hit at parties.

Top 5: Reasons The Anaheim Ducks Won't Make The Playoffs

Dumb penalties and lots and lots of shots: a look at your 2010 Anaheim Ducks. The latest edition of the Top Five series looks at why they won't make the playoffs.

Kings Release Training Camp Groups, I Overanalyze Them

The Kings released their groups for training camp and I care way too much about them.

This stream has:

Kings Training Camp Battles to Watch

The Kings are opening up training camp on Saturday: check out who has a chance at making the team.

Kings Training Camp Battles to Watch

The Kings are opening up training camp on Saturday: check out who has a chance at making the team.

This stream has:

Ducks Announce Prospect Camp: 5 Prospects To Watch

5 Ducks prospects to watch at this weekend's prospect game. I mean, you shouldn't watch Ducks games at all, but if you have to you should watch for these guys.